I know this is old, but I wonder how Sann and Cookie are doing and if they can give an update on their situation?

I am a guy and my ex-girlfriend and I did a long distance for 8 or so months (dating for 15 months). The problem was we are from two different countries and in order to end the distance we had to get married. I was ready to marry her but she wasn’t ready to move on to that stage in life. Distance was ruining the relationship for her, and like cookie and sann, she distanced herself from me and treating me like crap despite my best efforts to close the distance. I wanted to Facetime and text and know what is going on with her life, I visited her after our first 3 months of separation and had plans to see her 8 months later. I had plans to take up an unpaid internship so that we can live together for 6 months. However she started to feel talking to me as a chore and obligation and soon conversations became less and less, video chats became less and less. She would not participate in talking so conversations were usually short and awkward with me trying to find various topics to talk about.

Then I couldn’t take it anymore and we had a fight about it and we cried over the phone and she said perhaps its time to break up. It’s 3 days into the break up and I know she is heart broken and sad and lonely and she hopes everything will work out in the end ( I don’t know what that means). All I know is she loves me and she wants to be with me, but she doesn’t want to do distance relationship anymore. She has said before she wants to marry me but she wants to be ready for it and not do it to solve the distance. She knows she can’t have her cake and eat it too and that’s why she said “I don’t know what the future will look like for us, but right now this is what needs to happen.”

I am really upset and everything still feels like a shock and does not feel like we are no longer together. I am dying to talk to her and find out if she is doing okay because I still love her. I don’t know if the time and space will help her change her mind or like you guys, feeling relieved about the break up/end up falling for someone else. Because that would really kill me inside.. I see a future in her; we lived together for 6 months before in our relationship and it was the best time of our lives; we did every family event together and celebrated every holidays together and we traveled the world together. We know we are perfect for each other and that’s why I am so damaged by this break up. What should I do??

I have also made plans (and she is aware of this) 5 months down the road to fly over to her and see her for her birthday. If we are still separated by then, then I guess it is my last time seeing her ever again in my life and it will be a closure visit but deep down, both of us know that this visit is my last attempt to rekindle our feelings and get her back into our relationship..