thanks dear for replying me its helping me a lot to understand whole situation more..
I feel the same i need someone to understand and care for me in real not something based on internett.
reason i came here and wrote my feelings is that i was afraid that if i tell my friends they will simply think i’m crazy,
because i myself have thought on this matter so much that i feel now i need help from someone who don’t know, who won’t judge me.
I’m glad u didn’t came up with simply meaning of all this is love.
I will take ur advice and will work on it as i no more wants to live with past .