Dear Ravi:

I disagree with your understanding of anger. I believe that it is your misunderstanding of it that is making you miserable and until you have an understanding of what it truly is, until such time, you will continue to struggle. As in “The truth will set you free”- an understanding of what anger truly is, will set you free from kicking the cat.

Anger is not a bad thing, an outside influence, a demon like. It is not poison that needs to be eliminated. Anger is a good feeling because in it there is a valid message. We need to listen to its valid message and act with that message in mind so to operate for our own well being (and the well being of others).

To eliminate anger, to be perfectly peaceful is as impossible as it is to stop being a human while still being alive as a human being.

You wrote above: “I don’t however have good reason to believe that I can selectively direct my anger only at people who “deserve” it, and not indulge in behaviour commonly called kicking the cat.”

It is too bad that you can’t selectively direct your anger at the people who are really hurting you because the natural and real reason we have anger is to selectively protect ourselves against people who are hurting us.

anita