I know Anita. At least I know that my efforts to change myself, make up for my behaviour and do what’s right now are sincere… and I can see some effects of that in my life at least. What’s not in my power to change, I can’t do anything but leave it up to karma. It doesn’t make the pain less intense. But I do know that every strong relation has to endure such tough phases and if our bond truly is genuine, and I truly do love her, then we cannot be separated permanently. At least I do feel it in my heart, delusion or not.