Dear Nan:

One month since last communication although I did read your replies to others’ threads since. Yes, there is no age limit to pain and anguish and no matter how old we are, as long as we are alive we are vulnerable. If there is abuse, we get hurt, no matter how old we are. We never grow out of being vulnerable.

The hate you are afraid of, following your well planned and thoroughly thought out escape plan is not in the future, it has been in your present the whole time you’ve been afraid. That’s the funny thing (funny in an unfunny way)- that we think we are afraid of something that will happen in the future, only what we are afraid of is already happening and has been happening for a long time. Living in fear is a present time anguish. It is already happening.

You are trying hard to make your move with minimal disruption of others’ lives. Can you imagine being bold enough to state something like this to the world: I am alive and therefore I make waves. I leave a footprint where I walk. My life is not about avoiding leaving a footprint behind!

You are on my mind; keep posting.

anita