Home→Forums→Relationships→Time and money strife in marriage→Reply To: Time and money strife in marriage
You give me hope Anita. My doctor told me that I’ll probably be on the meds forever. At first I was ok with it, I felt like..ok..if I need them then..ok I guess. Now I don’t feel so enthusiastic. I know I was depressed in the past but now it isn’t so much about feeling hopeless and is more so, the raging different emotions. I haven’t been officially diagnosed as having borderline personality disorder but after taking many online tests and just reading the description..it is me, 100%. I’m now thinking that I don’t need the meds that I’m on so much as I need to learn to control my vicious mood swings and stop the black/white, end all be all thinking. I don’t know how to do that currently. I have a bad fight or flight reaction also and as soon as things start to go south, I feel the urge to jump ship and run away from it/hide from it. I was off the meds for about a year or so a long time ago and boy did I relapse hard after that and since then I’ve been too afraid to try and wean off of them again. I can be a true terror of an emotional nightmare with my meds at times…god..what would it be like with out them?!
I hope that one day I can get off the meds. I don’t like being dependent on them but with my experience of being off them, sometimes I wonder if it may be better as I said.