Dear XenopusTex:

At the end of the song “Those were the days” it reads:
“Oh my friend we’re older but no wiser
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same”

Older, but in our hearts the dreams are still the same, and your dream is still to-love-and-be-loved, at least that dream got triggered by this woman. Only a few days ago you dreamed it and felt that hope. This is why it saddened me so much, that you dreamed and hoped and it didn’t come true.

You do work many, many hours, almost like a machine, a prosecuting machine, taking on others’ work.

You are not a machine. Machines don’t live in quiet desperation and they don’t worry about looking silly.

You wrote: “Not sure how to present my softer/kinder side without seeming silly”- you looking silly can be adorable.

I still think a woman 13 years or so younger than you is a dating possibility. Getting to know a woman (another woman), dating will be further opportunity to develop your Emotional Intelligence. I think you made significant progress in this kind of education on this very thread! You started your education and am doing very well, I says. Please don’t give up and don’t give in to that… quiet desperation. Don’t go back to it. Continue instead on this path of learning and reaching out.

anita