Dear bluefire:

You wrote: ” I feel like a living contradiction, feel like I have a truly fixed personality but it changes and turns around depending on the environment and on the people”

I don’t believe anyone is born with a “fixed personality”- I don’t believe, for example, that a person is born introverted or extroverted. This as other personality traits develop over time as a result of interacting with other people, most significantly, as a result of interacting with our parents (the most important and powerful people in our young lives).

As a baby, you were born confident to just be. Then later, that confidence was damaged. Hardly anyone, if anyone at all, keeps that baby-confidence. We are all taught to lose some of it, for example, we are no longer confident enough to go to perform the body functions in front of other people, as babies do. And it is a good thing, I suppose.

So the environment and other people are very influential, when we are young, in determining our personality, how we feel and how we behave.

You are 18, very young. Lots to learn, for one, learn who you are, how influenced you were by your parents/ early environment, how you behave now as a result of that influence, why you behave differently with different people at different times, what you would like to change because it is not working for you, what you can’t change, and so forth.

What do you think so far about what I wrote?

anita