Dear spiritwalker:

In my book this is not close: genetic affiliation and geographic proximity. If your sister has little to no empathy for you, or no more empathy for you than to a stranger, then she is not close, it is my belief. If your sister disregards your feelings and mistreats you, then she is not close.

You are upset that she expressed an intent to become a firefighter when it has been your expressed dream, not hers. Maybe she expressed this to spite you, maybe it is the next “shiny object” for her, as in: firefighting sounds cool!

If it is to spite you, ignore her best you can- don’t associate with her and she will not have the payoff of seeing you upset. If it is the next shiny object for her… she will abandon the idea soon enough for the next shiny object.

I would suggest that you determine what kind of a relationship, if any, you will have with your sister based on who your sister is, who you are, and what promotes your well being. You don’t need to be polite to her if it means you suffering.

You need not suffer unecessarily, so take care of yourself. Let go of people who harm you, be it blood relatives or not.

anita