Dear HikerGal74:

I didn’t suggest at all that you should have tried to talk to him into reconsidering, not at all. I think it would have made sense to ask him questions, to understand what happened. He owes you that and you have the right to ask questions. If him being unhappy is not something he brought up before, I would want to know when it started, why, following what… why he didn’t bring it up in conversation with you, etc.

I think there is a law of some kind that if an employer fires an employee, the employer has to explain why, give a reason (maybe it applies to government as the employer, and in the U.S…) Anyway, you have the right to know the reasons, to ask questions so that you can process what happened. How can you process and move forward if you don’t understand what happened.

The questions you asked me in the last post are questions you can ask him, if you meet him. If you initiate meeting him to talk, or doing so by email, however is comfortable and more likely to be effective, let him know that you are not at all, in any way shape or form trying to talk to him into getting back together. Let him know your only motivation is to understand what happened, so that you are wiser.

anita