Thank you for your answer, Anita. And it does make sense. I’ve been considering moving back, of course. It is one of the major questions right now.

But, it would be incredibly hard to leave Berlin behind. I have worked my way into the independent video game scene there, have a lot of friends there, as well as all my belongings. Right now, I’m even getting sick benefits and following that, unemployment money. And it’s not as if there’s a life set up & waiting for me in the Netherlands… but at the same time, the big city brings stress as part of the package.

It’s a massive conundrum that might take me a long time to figure out. In the mean time I’m not putting down any roots, which also hinders me in my development. I HAVE to decide.

Yes, something is missing in my development: the ability to set goals for myself and follow through.