Dear laceycast:

The pros for staying in Michigan:

1. You are currently employed in Michigan and future employment is way more likely in Michigan than in CA.

2. You plan on attending beauty school and there is one available for you in close proximity in Michigan (And in CA, is it a beauty school you wish to attend and is it 75 miles away).

3. You live with young aunt and uncle, no children and their house rules that are bearable (while in CA you’d have zero rules, but you would be the one cleaning and cooking in the house, the reason you wanted to leave CA in the first place).

4. You are living rent free in Michigan (while in CA, if living at home you’d do all the cleaning and cooking and if you will be living close to the school, you will be paying rent).

5. You don’t have friends in Michigan but you don’t have close friends in CA.

The pros of returning to CA:

1. You will have the friends you had there but these are not close friendships.

2. The weather is nicer in CA.
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You asked for an outside perspective on your situation. My perspective is:

A definite NO on living with your parents and siblings.

This is why you left to begin with. To go back to the same dynamic makes no sense whatsoever. And to change long practiced pattern, that is, you working hard as if you were the parent to your siblings, would be a difficult pattern to break. Any pattern, long established, is very difficult to break. Why bother trying?

Next: Michigan or not? If not Michigan then someplace else, but not your parents’ house.

In summary: employment is a valid pro for Michigan. Distant friends in CA is a very weak Pro for CA. The no brainer easy understanding, for me, is no on living with your parents and siblings.

It is time for you to be free of the unfair burden placed upon you, to be a parent instead of the kid that you should have been allowed to be!

anita