Dear Carla:

I suppose you are back to work by now and seeing him there. Whenever you see him and thoughts and feelings about past closeness are triggered, remind yourself that this closeness is now in the past, gone and done with. Don’t fight or argue with your feeling, pressuring yourself to be over him already (as your friends and family suggested to you). Let yourself feel whatever you feel but talk to yourself at the same time. Repeatedly tell yourself: “It is over. The relationship is over. The closeness is over. It is in the past.” And as you say that to yourself, calm yourself, soothe yourself: “And it is okay. I am okay.”

Post again, anytime.

anita