Dear Ann:

Seems to me like you’ve been very understanding, empathetic and accommodating to him. A relationship- the one you currently have with him, as undefined as it is- has to be a Win-Win for it to be healthy for you. I am afraid you are so empathetic to him and so accommodating that you may be on your way to a Lose-Win relationship, that is one where you suffer needlessly, sacrifice, focus on his well being and not yours.

Feeling guilty after you were assertive with him is not a good thing, as I see it. It may lead to walking on egg shells, trying not to distress him and in that process the relationship becomes a Lose for you.

He broke up with you, then it is only fair that … the relationship ends. That is what breaking up is all about, ending a relationship.

Hope you post again here-

anita