Dear jjcooper7889:

I think you are ready to move out, to leave this hellish marriage. I get this feeling, that you are ready by reading your last post. Just when it seems so impossible, once you leave, you will wonder (this is my prediction): how can it be so easy? You will be amazed by how easy it was.

It seems so difficult from where you are now, but once you cross to the other side (away from a life with her), it may boggle your mind: why didn’t I do it before? It is so easy…

Like the elephant, I suppose, with the ankle chain, breaking free was so easy: the chain was not even felt. It just lifted its leg and it broke. It took a step forward, no problem. And it exclaims: That is all? That was all that was too it?

Your therapist may not have been correct in her analysis. She may have had a limited understanding of you and your situation, focusing on one corner of the picture, persistently shedding light on that corner and ignoring the rest of the picture.

At this point, if you get into a robotic mode of action: removing your own focus from your thoughts (in your head) to your chained leg (back to the elephant comparison), and lift that leg, take a step forward…. no thinking, just doing the steps to get out… not thinking until you are on the other side.

anita