Hi Anita,

“She feels comfortable with the arrangement she is interested in.” Again, this is something I haven’t thought of before. For all the emotional needs she has from me even after she started dating this guy, I just went with the flow and responded as politely as I could; I couldn’t step back and see that she is only trying to make the whole situation comfortable for her. She often calls/texts me, looking for warmth and a listening ear even after she started dating the new guy. There was once when I responded very coldly, so she got upset and thought I was being unfair and mean to her, because I treat most of my friends with patience and love while I was deliberately being cold to her. I just felt I don’t have the responsibility to take care of her emotional needs anymore – if she wants the needs met, she could go to her new guy, or do it herself! But then sometimes I feel sorry and go back to being more caring. She then takes it for granted, and asks for more. This has to stop! Thank you Anita for pointing this out.

Charlotte