Anita,

No, he is no longer my boyfriend. We broke up 5 months ago, and about 1 month ago we began to reconnect and spend time together. We are still intimate and for that reason is why I choose not to date other men. I chose not to date because those are my values and because I am simply not ready to move on. I wish I was past this pain of having lost the love of my life. I am not.
If you read my above post it will maybe help shed some more light to the whole dynamic of this relationship. About a week ago, when I made the post, I begin to question how keeping him in my life until May 2017 will impact me. I haven’t felt very satisfied with it and have felt even sad. Deeply saddened by it.
I still can’t see him as just a friend or just an ex. I still love him dearly. I chose to continue the contact with him because I saw it as a small window of opportunity to do and say what I never did before, some extra time to make great memories that will last a lifetime. Great memories that would maybe, just maybe, wash away the bad ones from the relationship. The memories of all the fights and why we broke up. We just wanted to make new memories as “friends” by leaving out the drama and issues that came with a relationship, enjoying each others company as the unique individuals that we are. No strings attached.
Well, maybe that was too good to be true, because we continue to have issues. As I noted, he is C-O-M-P-L-E-X.
I feel it has brought me down and that’s what lead me to pause my personal growth and the things that were keeping me happy and well balanced.
It is just so hard to let go because I don’t want to loose him as a friend. He is of the very few people that I am 100% myself with. He means so much to me because men and people in general like that don’t come easy. In the best ways and unfortunately in some of his bad. Is it too soon for a friendship? Am I expecting too much too soon?

Thank you so much for your attentive response.

PEACE & LOVE,

Ganesha87