Dear kangli:

Your last post helps me understand better. You don’t regret the divorce and I think it is a very good motivation to divorce for the purpose of protecting your daughter from witnessing fights between her parents. Such fights are devastating and damaging to a child, so good job at protecting her!

Regarding your married ex friend and lover, you accept the ending of this relationship because you believe it is wrong to be involved with a married man- again: I support you doing the right thing on this front as well.

How to move on is your question when you feel so attached to him. I think that even though you believe it is the wrong thing to be involved with a married man, that you are still hoping that you and him will be together. am thinking that part of you is hoping that somehow… you and him will re-unite and that hope is keeping you attached to him and prevents you from feeling the sadness of the loss and moving on.

Am I correct? Will be back to the computer in 12 hours or so, hope to read your reply then.

anita