Dear Poppy:

Regarding the first, every person is correct sometimes, no matter how often incorrect otherwise. By stating that I believe your mother is correct about your boyfriend, I was making the point that her being correct on the issue of your boyfriend, does not make her correct about other issues.

Regarding the second: your boyfriend (ex, maybe current, at this point) is not trustworthy as far as I see it. His texting his ex girlfriend repeatedly is inappropriate for a man in a relationship with a new girlfriend; his stated reasoning, that it is “for revenge”- simply cements the inappropriateness of the texting, meaning he is emotionally involved with her in a way that takes away from and betrays his relationship with you.

I suggested to you before, being on a friend status with him, so to re-evaluate him over time, but he refused that, stating he will not be waiting for you, meaning he wants a sexual relationship to resume right away and has no time for friendship. That means to me that he will not take the reasonable consequences of his wrongdoing (the texting), same as not taking responsibility for his wrongdoing.

These things lead me to side with your mother on this one issue- wrong man for an honest, loving, honorable relationship.

(will be back to the computer in a few hours)

anita