Dear debbie79:

I figured early in your thread, that the wedding expenses/ marriage expenses in the future, clearly played a part in his distress. Being a people pleaser and a bad communicator (your evaluations) leads me to think that for some time he felt conflicted about the expenses but kept going because it made you happy.

I didn’t know if the Deacon will share his test results with you outside your (ex) finance’s presence. If he shares the results with you – that can be enlightening. I hope you share those tomorrow, here.

Regarding mode of communication, I prefer emails over phone calls, face-to-face (and definitely texting!). This is how I communicate with you here, on your thread. I prefer emails because I can take my time reading and re-reading the text, can take my time responding. Maybe it will suit him because he wouldn’t have the pressure to answer right there and then. He can take his time as well. Maybe.

If you compose an email for him (and what you wrote above as potential content there is reasonable)… wonder if you should wait to tomorrow (Deacon’s input). I can help you, if you’d like, in giving you input on it.

anita