fbpx
Menu

Reply To: Traumatic divorce, remarriage of ex has brought out a lot of grief

HomeForumsTough TimesTraumatic divorce, remarriage of ex has brought out a lot of griefReply To: Traumatic divorce, remarriage of ex has brought out a lot of grief

#128199
Anonymous
Guest

Dear peacetoall:

I am sorry for the pain you experience and have been experiencing for so long. Clearly, half time with your son is legally all you can have, with the custody agreement you have. Make the best of it, being a good father to your son. Be gentle with yourself as you grieve your dissolved marriage and limited time with your son.

I re-read your original post and two following posts, trying to understand better what could have happened. What I figure is that she was and is indeed heartless. She did not and does not value you, figuring that hurting you is not a matter worth considering. All that mattered to her was she feeling good.

I think she allowed herself the outrageous behaviors of talking to her boyfriend- while you were in the other room, still married- talking and laughing, having your son say good night and ‘I love you’ to her boyfriend- while you are in the other room, crying-

She felt comfortable doing those heartless, outrageous things because she knew there is no danger from you, that is, you will be the devoted husband you have been to her, no matter what she does. She put her all into her new relationship knowing she… owns you, so to speak, that there will be no consequence to her behavior, that you will always welcome her as your wife.

She was correct about you being there for her no matter what she did. After all that she did, those outrageous behaviors on her part, you “thought there was a chance of reconciliation even after our separation” – you were willing to have her back as your wife.

You have to be careful about WHO it is that you love unconditionally. Don’t love unconditionally, at least not by intent, a woman who has no love for you. There is no merit in such love.

Interesting, you ended your original post with “love you all”- freely and indiscriminately giving your love to all. Evaluate a person first before loving that person and giving that person your all, and you will prevent future traumas and grief. Hope you learn and heal.

anita