Dear Joe:

I prefer your talk, by far, over anyone’s talk about trivia, anytime. And then, I prefer your silence over anyone’s talk about most trivial things people do talk about. With particular individuals who talk for the sake of emitting sounds, I do find myself thinking, if not actually making the “hissing noise of ‘Ssh!’”

Often, people talk to relieve stress, as a stress output, content irrelevant. I understand the need, I just don’t want to be present when that happens. I do prefer the written format, as on this website, because I can stop reading whenever I want to and resume when I choose, or not. There is no ongoing, constant noise inflicted on me without my control.

The approval/ disapproval point so entertainingly presented by you- there is great personal, individual freedom that I am experiencing these very days, for a while now, ongoing, because I find myself valuing what I approve of over what others approve of. For example, I value talking about emotions and things that matter, talking with the purpose of learning and resolving (which is why I like to read and reply to people’s shares on this website), instead of talking to let off steam or to escape silence. So when I am silent, I am okay with being silent. I no longer feel distressed, thinking: what do THEY think of me?

A lot of pressure is removed by no longer feeling that PRESSURE to win others’ approval by doing what I disapprove of. Others who approve of talking-to-vent can do so among themselves, I will not interfere. I just won’t be present. I don’t invite people into my life who will be venting to me.

Thank you for your delightful posts! I greatly enjoy them. (And feel free to post anything less delightful, as long as it is genuine, authentic-Joe, it is good enough for me to read!

anita