Dear bricklady:

It is for your best interest, as well as Brickman’s, as well as his children’s, that you are aware of, and that you accept the reality, that by this very point, in reality, you and Brickman are not a couple. You are not co-parents. His children are not your children.

The attachment to him and to his children, your feeling of safety in the idea of an instant family, I imagine, brought you much comfort, but it is not serving you well at this point because it is not based on reality. It may be, in the future, but it is not so now.

Resist reality and you prolong your distress; accept it, you feel temporary discomfort and long term calm. That calm will promote your best interest.

anita