Dear Marge:

No, this was not the “only one and true love”- not even close. I know it because of what you shared about his behavior and your feelings about his behavior. If it was a “true love” there would be different sharing about it.

If this is the first serious romantic relationship in your life, and you had hopes and dreams about a “and they lived happily ever after” future, then there was magic, at times, to everything. It is like a child waking up to a new day, the sun shining, the grass green, the future feels magical, promising. An adult waking up to the same day… well, it is a nice day. Nice, not magical.

Similar here. In your next relationship, your hopes and dreams will probably be different (I hope so), and so there may be less- or none- of that magic you experienced.

But that magic was not about who he was and is (and it is not about the sun and the green grass), it is about the magic in your brain, the newness of the experience, the hopes and dreams.

In the future, you have a chance to experience “one and true love”- in a relationship with a dependable, reliable, honest… truly loving man. What will make it true love will be in the nature of the relationship.

anita