Dear steph:

You are very welcome. I like what you wrote about taking care of yourself: “Self-care is not just taking a bubble bath or giving your feet a massage–it can be hard work! … It is really sticking up for oneself and knowing one’s limits and what one stands for, not letting people take advantage”- excellent!

Maybe you can come up with a plan to take care of yourself in the context of the next relationship with a man. For example you can decide on a period of time, or a number of dates that you will have without physical intimacy, so to get to know the man with some objectivity first, and then decide about how to proceed. I think planning for the next relationship is a good idea, best you can.

Communicating with the next man effectively will be very important so to minimize incorrect assumptions, to be clear and direct.

What do you think?

anita