Dear Mina:

I re- read your original post and it reads very reasonable to me. I am impressed that you are only 19 and showing more clarity of thinking and understanding than a lot of people of any age.

Regarding your posts from yesterday and my input on various parts of it:

“we broke up BECAUSE we love each other. Him letting me go, and me letting him go is the biggest proof of our love”- I agree. It was loving to break up so that he can have the peace of mind he will need doing his military service and studying in a distant college. The break up will prevent unnecessary distress for the two of you, and that is definitely loving.

“Just because we are not with that person due to several conditions does NOT change a thing about how we felt for each other.”- I agree.

“We will love and take care of each silently and from afar.”- I don’t agree or disagree because I can’t predict the future and neither can you, or him.

“It is just right now – we are not in a place to have a long term commitment.”- I agree, very reasonable, logical, makes sense.

“… some strongly disagrees thinking that by having this mindset – it means that I am not moving on with my life”- would have been true (that you will not move on with your life) only if loving him “silently and from afar,” meant that you will not be available for another relationship any time in the future, being occupied with loving him “silently and from afar”, expecting him to do the same. But your second post yesterday clarifies that these are not your expectations, that you are okay with a limited friendship, which you specified. Therefore, I disagree… with those people who disagree with your mindset.

“What I am saying is that sometimes love itself isn’t enough to keep a relationship going, which on my case is true. But it doesn’t change the fact that its was love, is love and probably in the future will always be love”- I agree with the qualifying note that the love you are expecting is of the limited friendship kind that you specified in your second post yesterday.

I hope you feel better soon, that you adjust to the breakup. Give it time as you take good care of yourself and please do post again anytime. I will be glad to reply.

anita