Dear Meredith:

I have a suggestion and I will give you an example taken from your original post.

You started it with: “So my 34th birthday was yesterday, and I’m aware that most people think ‘Birthday-schmirfday, what’s the big deal?!’ I don’t subscribe to the whole blow-out birthday celebrations either. What I’m trying to say is..”

Before you came to the issue of your thread, you had a thought, something like:  don’t complain about your birthday! Buck up! Birthday-Schmirfday! Your feelings are not a big deal! You imagined people reading the thread will be thinking that because you already thought it. So you prefaced your thread with your response to your own thought.

My suggestion: pay attention and recognize that thought, a repeating, persistent thought, no doubt, occurring at different times throughout the day at different situations. Then think something new, something like, in this case: my birthday does matter to me, my feelings are a big deal. I will type this thread like my feelings, no apologies, no prefacing.

anita