Dear Charlotte:

You indicated in the last few lines of your last post that you don’t feel safe socially. Incorporating your previous sharing: you are overwhelmed by being around people in your small college, seeing the same people wherever you go, cafeteria, gym, etc. I am thinking that what happens is that as you see the same people daily, you think… that they are thinking:  “no one wants to be my friend… I’m a burden to others, I’m stupid, etc.”-

In other words, you are projecting your own thoughts, your own inner critic’s voice into others. And that causes you anxiety, understandably.

My suggestion is that when you hear your inner critic’s voice, its messages, acknowledge to yourself that these are your thoughts, not other people’s thoughts. It only feels like other people are thinking that. You have no way of knowing what they are thinking. (They may be thinking … that you are thinking that they are undesirable in some way).

If you separate your own thoughts from the belief that these thoughts exist in other people’s brain, that will make you, I hope, more comfortable as you come across the same people in college, as you interact with them.

Also, spend some time reviewing the skills you learned in previous therapy and treatments, review what worked for you, what helped you in the past and form the intent to practice these skills again. It is common to forget to use what worked in the past. Return to it and post again anytime.

anita