Dear insparagus:

You wrote: “I got to the root of why I acted the way (cheating, as a teenager)…Back then I I had a bad self-esteem and no sympathy for myself”-

This means you had no sympathy for yourself before you cheated. It means that you believed, before those teenage relationships, that you don’t deserve sympathy, that there is something bad that you have done that makes you unworthy of sympathy.

It is that thing, or those things you believe that you have done wrong that are fueling your anxiety about cheating, I believe.

The issue to be looked at is located before the cheating, only it is more difficult to look at, I am thinking, than the cheating. So you’ve been focusing on the cheating.

Your thoughts?

anita