Dear Anita,

Thank you!

I also want to shed more light on my life, and maybe you can help me understand that as well.

Over the last decade, I have always found myself alone. I believe that I do that to myself on purpose. I do not hold onto things, and when they’re gone, I cry, I regret, and then find myself living a lonely life. It has happened over and over and over again, not just with the relationships, but friendships as well. Am I wired to just seek loneliness? Am I always looking for something better that I fail to see what I have in my hands? Am I never satisfied? I’m practically in the same position emotionally as I was when I was 20 years old. I do not like that about myself because it always makes me alone and then I suffer. Is my mind making me suffer on purpose? What is happening? I mean I know I can find reasons to get over this girl, but I did not put much effort into trying to make it work for the long-term. Am I wired this way to only see short-term happiness but never expect a long-term solution? I mean no one is perfect, and she wasn’t either. But at least I had someone who loved me unconditionally. I kept pushing her away and now I am back to square one with loneliness. Sorry for the rant Anita. But, you’re the only one I feel comfortable sharing everything!