Dear Carla:

His experience with his father was damaging to him before the his parents’ death.

The reason you found “The darkness in him … alluring” is probably because of your own darkness, that is, things you are not fully aware of. I hope you find out those things in quality psychotherapy. If you would like to share here for possible insight, please do, particularly, about how you felt as a child, wanted… or not wanted by your parents?

anita