Dear Anita,

Your insights have been valuable and scary. You are right, that he is sometimes untruthful. You are also right in that he has Asperger’s tendencies. I am unclear if the lying comes from the Aspergers and him genuinely not understanding somethings or because he has a habit of bending the truth.

I also think that I am extremely critical and uncompassionate and that I need to work on this. I have been so aggressive on confronting him about his own shortcomings that I have turned into a monster, and pushed him away. I am working hard on myself, on being there, and on not turning him away. He says he will start learning non-violent communication. I love him and I want him to be here with me. And I want to have the gift of being there for him. I feel I am a failure and worthless.

Thank you again for your insights, it feels like a talking with a good friend somehow.