Dear Donatto:

I like it that you learned  from this relationship, that you took a valuable lesson from it and “decided trying  to be  friends first with the next person, with no intentions for romantic or sexual involvement”- that is, to  get to know the next person first, before further involvement.

When we become emotionally/ physically  involved  with another, that involvement interferes with rational thinking. It interferes with the objective evaluation of  who the person is.

One most  important thing to  evaluate before such involvement is the other person’s  intent and ability to carry on a monogamous relationship with you.

* If friendship with him will cause you distress that cannot be resolved, better not be  friends with him.

anita