Dear not-so-lost-star:

I’ve been thinking lately of the experience of anxiety as being on a scary theme park ride, going up, then falling down and you scream, others scream… you know the experience, right? It used to surprise me, how scary some of those rides are and how every person made it safe back. Same with anxiety, it is scary but we make it back safe again and again… and yet again.

What better evidence is there that anxiety doesn’t kill, as long as we don’t undo those belts that hold us safe in our seats (on the ride) and otherwise, for as long as we don’t operate heavy machinery, drive or attempt any other task that requires calm attention.

“It will not kill me” is something you may intentionally think when anxious, while you are holding on to something, resuming the calm needed for your next move.

The intensity of the anxiety does get weaker over time, over a long time. Can’t rush this process and it is not  linear. When the anxiety is lesser one day, it doesn’t mean it will be lesser the day after or that very evening.

When you feel anxious, one way to return to calm as soon as possible, is to move very slowly, very attentively, sort of moving in slow motion. Do what you need to do, tie shoes or prepare your food very slowly. See how that works.

And yes, it is about surrendering while keeping the faith: surrendering to the here-and-now in slow motion (the security belt) while keeping our faith in our safety (“this feeling will not kill me”).

anita

anita