Dear not-so-lost-star:

A very elky post. This is an image I have: in your brain there is indeed this “father elk being huge and so dominant”, taking most of your brain space. Danger: his anger. Safety: his calm. Your behavior has been motivated primarily to bring on his calm.

Human aggression is indeed dangerous, responsible for lots of crime in homes, on the streets, for wars… so no wonder a little girl gets scared when her father displays aggression and will do anything to prevent it, whatever it takes. These very ways to prevent his aggression, have not been effective in your life, outside your life at home.

Aggression in your life has been from your father. No one else has been aggressive toward you to that extent or even remotely close to that extent, correct?

You know now, I assume, that your father, even if he gets angry presently, will not kill you, but emotionally you don’t know that. We are programmed to fear aggression as if it will bring about our death. After all this is what animals in the wild do, get angry, maim and kill.

Away from your father, you are safer than  with your father because the danger presented to you, personally, has been this one thing: your father’s aggression.

On your trip, be careful, watch for your safety, take precautions. And look around, like those elk in the periphery, see things you didn’t see before,  consider what you didn’t consider before.

I hope you share with me more and more of what you see, when you want to share, that is.

anita