Dear Tom:

You wrote last August on your other thread: “I was the biggest pessimist you’d ever meet because to me that was the logical and practical thing to do”. It was logical and practical to expect the worst of people because you did, in reality, receive the worst.

It is very painful to trust, to expect the best and then, to receive the worst. It is a long fall down. But when you expect the worst and receive it, you don’t fall. This is why it is logical and practical to be a pessimist, isn’t it?

The happening with this woman magnified for you the experience of hurt that you suffered long before you met her. It brought that pain to your attention. To trust, to hope- and then to be let down, to be betrayed. There is that fall again.

I wish there was a way for you to attend quality psychotherapy for the purpose of addressing the earlier hurts, the bullying, the lack of protection by your parents, other hurts that you don’t remember. These hurts need to be seen and processed in such a way that they will no longer stand between you and living a better life.

I hope you post again.

anita