There have been several instances where I basically decided I’m not going to put myself out there anymore. For instance, I have had some bad breakups in the past, and the women sometimes completely betrayed my trust by using information I have told them about myself against me. Also, when I was in school I was not popular. My self-esteem was beat down quite often by other kids. I kept my mouth shut most days, choosing not to open up to people for fear that they would tell others. I can’t remember if there were other instances that contributed to this issue, but those are the primary causes.

Another part of the problem is even when prompted to interact in deep, meaningful ways, I freeze up and can’t think of anything to say. It seems that it must happen spontaneously or not at all sometimes. Other days it just flows out of me. I get so caught up in the effects of a long day at work, or even just in my mood at the time, that it’s often an obstacle for me mentally.