Hi there Anita,

Just thought I would write to see if you resonate with what is on my mind at the moment and also as a catch up. I am in the process of moving out of the flat as you know , and am finding that a little stressful as well as looking after a 4 year old and also doing some volunteering, sometimes it is finding those little moments to be able to sit and listen and be mindful /meditate and try and calm the stress. I find this difficult with the demands of life but am trying my best and trying not too put so much pressure on myself knowing that my anxiety could flare.

I think taking the first step of moving out and letting those around who care about me help me has opened some floodgates for my emotionally and am looking at my past pattern of depression/anxiety and past events. And sometimes this can be overwhelming.

I am in need now of doing something for myself, something which means I can have an outlet I enjoy and that I am good at and takes me away from motherhood. I left university I started and stopped the same course twice!! I think it was due to depression. I really want to use the skills and the knowledge I have gained still but because I left it means that its difficult to know the next step. Usually if someone finishes a degree they than go on to apply for jobs or go on to do further study.

I did dance in university and so having learned some things academically I feel I would like to use those skills with something else. I love the idea of dance movement therapy and have watched my son move about dancing and thought …..mmmm I wonder if I should start a dance tots group or something similar….I than can overthink it a bit much, which I recognise. But I would love to use the movement/dance theory I learned in addition to something else that I could start!! Maybe starting doing something to do with fitness or becoming a teaching assistant and learning more about child development and then specialising in movement as way to progress. I have so many ideas and it makes me sad that I have lost my way a little and my confidence has dropped. I love reading about all these things have bought books and looked online at little courses and I suppose I just need some guidance, to pull away from the big picture a little and focus on simple small steps!!

I am on the path of one step at a time…..its breaking all those things down at the moment I think I am having some trouble with .

Anyway maybe I just need to continue my self-care for now too

Hope you are well 🙂