Dear malllh:

You wrote that you are “going to try and control lashing out at the little things because it causes unnecessary fighting”- I think better you control lashing out at the little things and the big things.

I don’t believe there is such a thing as necessary fighting in the context of what should be a loving relationship. All fighting is unnecessary.

You wrote: “We both love each other a lot, but I just want to stop the little fights”.

Good plan, but better expand the plan and stop the little fights and the big fights.

If you can handle it, and if he can as well, not fighting, that is, then it can be a beginning to a new chapter in your relationship- a none aggressive chapter. In this chapter lots is possible to accomplish as long as the two of you are assertive (not aggressive) and respectful with each other.

anita