Dear Cheska:

You are welcome. The fact that you were closer to your grandmother and that you are closer to your aunts, but not close to your mother is a consequence of her aggression toward you, a consequence of her wrongdoing.

Personally, I am sure that when I was a young child I felt close to my mother, very close, as children do. She too was aggressive toward me. Soon enough, still a child, I was no longer able to feel close to her. I felt a lot of anger toward her. When she touched me, as in holding my hand, I felt very distressed. It is no wonder, because that hand hurt me physically.

You wrote: “she demands… she obliged me to treat her as a mother”- she can’t demand you to feel anything that you don’t feel. And what you do feel for her is a consequence of her actions. Basically, she is blaming you for the consequence of her actions against you.

anita