I used to be afraid that my father was going to do something sexual to me when I was really little, and I have no idea why.  Then it moved to my brother when I was 14.  Can’t really explain why.  After that every boyfriend I had, I always felt like they were too interested in sex, like that’s all they wanted me for.  I’ve never really been very physically attracted to the men I’ve been with, until I met Jason.

My husband has really been nothing but patient with me.  He always thought maybe I’d been molested as a child and just blocked it out because I was always so nervous when it came to sex with him, but when Jason came back into my life I felt more comfortable then I ever had.  I was even beginning to think maybe I really was just not interested in men in a physical way.  But Jason changed my mind with that.  We fit perfectly and always have.  He’s energetic and quirky.  Just very unique.  But he has emotional issues and can be so explosive at times.  After being with such a gentle husband for 6 years, it took some time for me to adjust being with someone who was the complete opposite.

He’s talking about trying to find a room for rent in the area, so we can still see each other, but he just won’t be living with us.  I know everyone will want me to leave him a lone completely, but as long as he’s in the same vicinity as me….we’ve just never been able to stay away from each other.  I’m also trying to make it sound like it was MY decision to have my son leave until he left our apartment, so that way it doesn’t ruin the relationship b/t him and my son.  As much as my son doesn’t want to live with him, he still enjoys hanging out with him.