Dear Kkasxo:

It is the betrayal of a family that hurts the most. Once you feel that sense of connection, of safety, of comfort, to have all that pulled out from underneath you, that is devastating. It definitely is “contributing to the pain”.

I think this is a likely possibility: just like his mother turned against you (gathering  the others to join her), she turned against her own son, when he was a child, repeatedly. This is why he cooperated with her, to avoid the punishment he is very familiar with, same you are familiar with now. He didn’t want to be the one she turned against, so he joined her.

anita