Dear riris:

You are welcome and hope you do come back to me on that point you referred to, or otherwise, post again anytime you would like.

“It has to be her (your mother’s) way of living, and if not, she’ll criticize every move or things I say. It’s like I should be someone else, to reach her standards”. That was my experience with my mother, and I tried to be “someone else” but wasn’t able to. I tried. I think we will do anything possible to please our mothers, whatever it takes, we will try anyway.

“Her mother is a clear example of narcistic behavior.. always says negative things and complains about everything”- so let’s say your mother’s mother criticized her, and in turn your mother criticized you. It doesn’t mean necessarily that you would do that to your child, does it?

I wonder if your mother ever expressed to you anger at her mother or is she dedicated to still trying to please her mother, and I wonder if after you shared with her what you shared here (did you?) if she ever considered that she was doing you wrong and that she should stop criticizing you.

anita