Dear Dee:

You are very welcome.

Clearly this man is after the thrill of sex, to put it directly, this is why he  is after very young women barely out  of their teens- they are youthful and youth is sexually attractive, that is all. He then told you about his problems because it  feels good to vent. Doesn’t feel good to be on the other side, listening,  so he didn’t do that. In summary: he goes for what feels good, avoids what doesn’t and that is the extent  of his moral character that you mentioned (“doesn’t lend itself  to upstanding  morals or character!”).

You w rote that maybe the fact that the  two  of you lived in the  same place as kids, that it  might  be a bad  association for him. What I think (and it occurred to me  during the first page  of your thread) is that you associated something positive between this history and him, assuming there is something warm and desirable in that long ago history, as if the two of  you were close at the time. I think he doesn’t have that association, the positive one that  you have.

I am familiar myself with an association  like that, seeing in a person something that isn’t there because  he  was there long ago, in the same place you were in, during those  long  ago years where everything felt so raw and intense, those hopes  and dreams of long ago.

Is it something  like this for you?

anita