Hi Sparkle

Try thinking about this from your partner’s perspective. He obviously loves you and is proud to be seen with you. Having you by his side makes him feel confident and attractive, which in turn makes other women notice him more.  He doesn’t understand your concerns because he doesn’t see these women flirting with him as a threat. He sees it as proof that he chose the right partner – after all, if he’s got you, he must be worth having, right?

But by being self-critical you are criticising his choice too. You are telling him he chose someone “rubbish”. How do you think that makes him feel? Doesn’t do much for his self-esteem, does it? The very person who makes him feel so great is telling him he’s deluded.

Put simply, you have a choice. You can wear him down by constantly suggesting to him that he is a fool for being with you, and eventually he will be brainwashed into thinking it must be true, which will make you both sad. Or you can show him some respect, accept that he loves you for who you are, and resolve to enjoy every day that you have together. You don’t have to agree with or even understand why he has chosen you. The fact is, he has, and he has his reasons.

So if not for your sake, then for his, respect his decision, accept that he is capable of deciding for himself, and that he has decided that you are the person he wants to be with, because you give him that confidence that no-one else can. And the next time you see another woman looking at him, just look at her, smile, and hold his arm a little tighter – you’ve made him feel more of a man, more attractive, which is why she noticed him – and it’s exactly why he wants to be with you.

Good luck!