Hi Anita,

you’re right i need to find the reasons of my behavior or i will not be able to fully step into my life, i will gladly answer the questions with the of my honesty:

1. When you wrote that you “have not being a good husband”- in what ways were you not a good husband, besides cheating on her and  lying  about the cheating?

A. maybe i wasn’t a bad husband since i always look out for her (although she mentioned several times she didn’t feel protected enough from me) i remember telling her that I wanted her to be more independent, capable to handle situations on her own, so when i said i wasn’t a good husband is due to laying to her and cheating so many times.

2. Did you lie to her about other topics besides the  cheating?

A. i don’t think i lied to her besides cheating (i didn’t just cheat physically but also virtually since i was addicted to dating chats and staff of that kind texting etc.)

3. Did you cheat  on her with women as well or only with men?

A. i did cheat on her with women as well ( the most hurtful was when she found out I and her cousin’s wife  were sex-texting for a long time ) i also got sexually involved with a few women from work back then (i don’t work there any more) one time when we were just married (maybe for a few months already) i approached a girl friend of hers trying to convince her to hung out with me (she she refused to my petition and told on me)  and i cowardly denied everything.

4. Did you have homosexual encounters with men before you were married, if so how long  before/ at what age  onward?

A. When i was in middle school and older guy took advantage of a situation i had (he when to my school’s office pretending to be my uncle because i asked him to do so this way i could get away with a situation without getting grounded from my parents) in return he performed oral sex on me (i’ve never told anyone about this) other than that no homosexual encounters before i was married.

5. What  do you mean by “I don’t like men at all”- what don’t you like about men?

A. what i mean is that i don’t feel physically or sexually attracted to men  (of course i have have guy friends and i like spending time with them) only toward women.

6. Regarding your sentence: “I’ve never felt attraction for men I don’t know why I did that I like women so maybe I need to find the reason why”- If you never felt  attraction for  men, does it mean you didn’t enjoy having sex with them?

A. i don’t think i enjoyed having sex it was more like a need to do something immoral or wrong (i never allowed anal intercourse it was just orally)

7. Can you give me an example of a random encounter with a man, where did it happen, when and how it came about (without giving any sexual specifics)?

A. it always happened either in my car or on the other man’s car, i used to go to a adult book store parking lot where many guys go and just park there to find random sexual encounters.

I also need to mention something else. i have a fetish on wearing women’s panties or tight pants and just looking myself at the mirror (in many ocassions i would wear women’s pants to go to this place looking for sex.

talking about this is very embarrassing for me i hope you don’t feel offended i’m just trying to find some sort of guidance.

thank you so much for the time you’re investing on a person you don’t even know Anita i really appreciate that.

Freeman