Dear jonny:

Problem is you and I have different values: I see the  problem primarily in your wife mistreating her children: “Foul languages, finding fault with me and kids is her daily routine”. You, on the other hand, see finances as a higher value.

I  very much believe the wife and husband should contribute financially as  each is  able, yes, but I see mistreatment of children as more problematic.

You believe that it is very important “in kids life to have  both parents”. I, on the other hand, believe it is most important for kids to not live with a parent who mistreats them. Better have one parent who treats them well, then two parents in the home, one  of which mistreats them.

It  is your primary responsibility to treat your kids well. Part of this responsibility is to protect them from your wife who mistreats them.

Therefore my number #1 in my plan would  be not that your wife  must stop communicating with her sister, but that she must  stop mistreating the children (and you, in their presence), and I would list to her specifically the ways she mistreats them, so that it is clear to her.

anita