Dear Lily:

You wrote to me earlier that your father projected his criticism of his own body weight into you, calling you “fat”. You are doing a similar  thing with this guy, K: it is you who  care so much about hurting him and  you are projecting this care into him, incorrectly believing that he  cares so much about hurting you!

You think that he cares so much about  hurting you that he  is now “abused  or severely damaged”.

No, you care a lot about hurting him, not the other way  around. If he cared  about hurting you, he would have answered your messages  on  time. He would have  called  you to ask how you are doing.

He would have called today to ask how  you are  feeling,  if he cared.

Don’t you see that?

anita