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Dear H:
My post to you today will be about The Problem, not the latest problem:
Unfortunately for you (and I wish it wasn’t so), when you were a child growing up, both your mother and your father repeatedly expressed anger: “Not sure what they were angry about. All I knew was that they were always angry growing up”.
This led to your strong fear of anyone getting angry at you. This fear is fueling your obsessive-compulsive behavior of asking people “the same things over and over again or messaging someone repeatedly”. If you send a person a message and the person doesn’t respond immediately your fear that he or she is angry at you escalates quickly, you panic, and you sent the person more and more messages.
There is only one way for you to calm this fear and to stop the compulsive behaviors fueled by this fear and that is to attend psychotherapy, maybe even consider psychiatric drugs to treat the obsessive compulsive element of your behavior.
Did you see a psychotherapist or a psychiatrist before, and if so what happened there?
anita