Hi Anita,

Thank you for your feedback once again. I understand what you are saying, that the child version of myself did not understand (or was aware of) the possible explanations for her negative interactions with me. I suppose the difficulty I have to addres this with her is two-fold; one, I cannot clearly remember specific examples or instances to describe to her what she had done that was wrong and why it hurt me, and two, I don’t believe she will ever full “own” or accept my account of her errors as a parent to me. Knowing this, how can I heal the relationship with her?

I don’t believe I will feel good about terminating the relationship altogether, nor do I think it is practical as I am very close to my father, and as I mentioned, they come as a package. Also, my family is quite close and we get together often, so I can’t imagine it would be possible to maintain the relationships with my other family members if I terminated hers and ours.

Lastly, there is an added component with her health. In fact, during the time I met the ex of two years ago, my mother was undergoing an experimental stem cell transplant to treat her terminal cancer. When this was occurring, her prognosis was estimated at 6 months if the treatment was unsuccessful. However, it has been successful but even still, her health is always up and down and I worry that I don’t have much time left to repair our relationship.